Realizations! Fear of Aging

Posted: June 25, 2011 in Uncategorized

Grandma:

I realize that my grandma was the first person I was close to that I saw get old and die. I realize that, as my grandmother aged, she in fact did not become less valuable to me or her family at all. On the contray, we valued her immensely. I realize her personality did not diminish and become less as she aged, just her body. I realize it will take time to figure out our human physical body’s aging systems, so that we can ‘last’ , not exist in time nor within limitations.

 

I no longer accept and allow myself to be frightened by the memory of the image of my grandma’s lined face. I no longer accept and allow myself to see/remember my Grandma as just a picture. I no longer accept and allow myself to judge my grandma’s face as ‘ugly’ or ‘not beautiful’ . I accept and allow myself to understand she would have changed her face if she could have but had no way to do this. I accept and allow myself to remember her as an expression of life, with no polarized words attached to her. Hopefully we’ll meet again.

 

Whenever I have the thought ‘ I am afraid that as I age, I become less valuable’ and I see the image of my grandma pulling back the skin of her deeply lined face, I stop, I breath. I no longer accept and allow myself to go into an energetic reaction of fear. Instead I realize I direct myself here in the physical and remember who my grandmother was a life, as an expression of life and that , that is indeed what I am and who I am as well. Neither my grandmother nor I require descriptive labels attached to us, as we stand one and equal to all that exist! 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Cigarette package:

I realize the photo on the cigarette package was meant to frighten so people would not smoke or would quit. I realize it did not work for me, I don’t smoke a lot and I enjoy it. I realize it is my ego, in the form of vanity, that is threatened. I just don’t want to look ‘ugly’ and that’s why the picture frightens me. I realize you can die from cancer, a car accident, or alcoholism (if you don’t smoke and you get fat and your ‘breadwinner’ leaves –well, what’s worse? That’s what I figured).  I realize I am 50 and do not look ‘old’ at all whether I smoke or not.

I no longer accept and allow myself to be directed by the fear  this cigarette pack ‘warning’ brings up for me.  I no longer accept and allow myself to be directed by my ego and go into an energetic reaction of fear that I too will look like this woman, this is my ‘fate’ . I no longer accept and allow myself to see myself as a picture. I no longer accept and allow myself to consider myself in danger, limited, controlled , helpless by outside forces/factors. I accept and allow myself to exist here, in this moment, breath by breath, as one and equal to all life and not in separation of physical human skin. I accept and allow myself to know that I have the same value, in this moment, and in each breath, as the value of all that is in existence, as I am that, I am not separation any longer. Therefore, we need not assign a value to anything as we stand together as whole, as one.

Whenever I go into an energetic reaction of fear, when I have the thought, ‘I am afraid that, as I age, I become less valuable’  I stop , I breath. I no longer accept and allow myself to be controlled by this fear, instead I realize I direct myself here in the physical and remind myself I am not a picture but an expression of life, existing one and equal with all life. I am not ‘age’ or ‘wrinkles’ that would be separation, something existing outside of me, defining me.

 

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s