Posts Tagged ‘Destonian’

I realized when doing muscle communication, part of my *Dip course, I have a huge resentment toward my husband. A few mornings ago I, not only reacted but over-reacted to the simple act of him turning off some lights,  first thing in the morning. Just recently I have been getting up first, now I am no longer taking any sleep medication I require much less sleep (awesome!).

When my husband, Alex gets up at 7am it is just getting light out so I still have the lights on and I am usually sitting at my computer.  He turned off the hall light upstairs and then came downstairs and turned off the dining room light, without asking me. I went ballistic. My justification was that, since I work at home, it was like he was in my office and how dare he make a decision that affected my ability to do my work.

I felt guilty about my over-reaction. I also brought into the ‘fight’ that he and his daughter are inconsiderate by leaving their personal belongings all over the house, not cleaning up the kitchen after themselves, etc.

I googled the difference between anger and resentment. I seems that anger is experienced in the moment-for the event that is occurring and resentment runs deeper as an emotion of anger built up over time for issues one has not dealt with let alone resolved.

What I then realized is that I am resentful towards him for not being open to moving and not being open to getting a loan so we can finish our renovations, which inhibits our ability to act should we decide to move.

We are so broke all the time, as our mortgage is large and the property tax is large as well as the bills to run the home (it is not a large home but not small either). So he is constantly turning down the heat, turning off lights etc. to reduce expenses. Although I agree with this strategy, I feel he goes to extremes about it and I want to be comfortable with small things in my home.

I believe we can live quite fine in a condo or smaller home. As well I worry that interest rates in Canada will rise (the government is warning the public this could happen at any time now) and as a consequence the housing market will crash and we will lose the equity we have in our home and end up owing more than we have, for example the value of the home drops to 100 and we owe 200. Therefore, we will not have any equity/money left to purchase a new home or even afford an apartment.

Whereas, if we moved now we would have a good sum to purchase a smaller property, even be mortgage free and thus reduce the financial stress in our lives and have money to assist our children with university, I could save to go to the Desteni Farm, he could go on a golf trip, whatever, not be cash strapped!

Thought: I hate Alex for penny pinching by turning off lights all the time and not agreeing to sell our home so we are not continually cash poor and stressed out and fighting.

Realizations: I realize Alex is doing his best to get along with me and ‘save’ our home. I realize he believes the market will subside/adjust somewhat and then slowly increase over time as we live in a ‘desirable’ location and the economy rises and falls and it will continue to do so as it did with our parents generation. I realize he thinks I adhere to some doomsday prophecy which he believes is unrealistic and I should not ‘worry’.  I realize it is my responsibility to address thoughts, feelings and emotions that come up inside of me and to communicate this calmly to another being when appropriate and not in reaction. I realize Alex loves and respects me and does intend the best for all of us as a family. I realize both he and Campbell have improved in picking up after themselves.

Acceptances & Allowances: I no longer accept and allow myself to react in anger and resentment towards Alex when he does things in the home to save money, we discuss bills, I bring up the option of moving, we are stressed before ‘payday’, the kids need money, we talk about our renovation.

Self Forgiveness:  I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think, ‘I hate Alex for penny pinching by turning off lights all the time and not agreeing to sell our home so we are not continually cash poor and stressed out and fighting.’

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not be aware of each and every movement within me so as to be responsible for my thoughts, feelings and emotions and not blame Alex for what I am experiencing.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to judge Alex as wrong and me as right, within the mind consciousness’s design of polarity thinking instead of focusing on myself and the issue so we can find a solution.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to harm myself by carrying issues within my human physical body by keeping silent in the moment when an issue arises, thereby creating resentment within and as me and unleashing this resentment toward someone I love and respect and causing them suffering.

Self-Corrective Application:  Whenever I go into an energetic reaction of resentment toward the thought, ‘I hate Alex for penny pinching by turning off lights all the time and not agreeing to sell our home so we are not continually cash poor and stressed out and fighting’ I stop, I breathe. I no longer accept and allow energy as a reaction inside of me to go unnoticed and not addressed. I remind myself it is all about money (which is not even real) and we are both working and life is very expensive. I remind myself Alex is my companion whom I appreciate as he offers me endless support and company. I bring myself back to the physical and out of my mind of thought, to what is in fact real and continue breathing with awareness of each breath here. I get on with my day.

*DIP  DesteniIProcess.Com     Please Investigate to Heal Yourself for Real

Desteni.Org

EqualMoney.Org

Why even talk about this? Isn’t anything private anymore?

Well, the thing is, we are all here. If we are honest and take an assessment of our world, we see much sexual dysfunction, violence, abduction even, all around sex. Yes folks, you don’t need to die to go to hell anymore, its right here on planet earth in 2012!

Why is the world like this ? How did this happen?

So what, you ask? What does that have to do with masturbation, it is my ‘right’, it is my body, I can think what I want to ,I am not hurting anyone.

In this fascinating account, which is the free 30 minute introduction of a series of audios on masturbation, it is explained how our masturbation-how it is currently practiced by human beings- becomes a mind possession through the participation of images in our minds, our fantasies. These fantasies become an energetic addiction that ‘grow’ become more extreme to feed upon itself to satisfy the desire.  It goes on from there.

It is, indeed, not harmless to you or others. We are all connected, as we are all here.

Be good to yourself, free yourself, learn to pleasure yourself without giving up intimacy with another…and so much more.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fYUatzmcyDY&feature=youtu.be

Desteni.Org

EqualMoney.Org

DesteniIProcess.Com

Well, it’s pretty rad, it actually means no Coach purses OR in time Coach purses for all!  Lol, I say this because I received a flyer in the mail today advertising the latest coach purse. I recall about 18 years ago a very wealthy friend defending her purchase of a $1000.oo coach purse (her therapist had told her to get over her guilt that she was ‘privileged’ and start enjoying life without the burden of guilt-and she has ever since, lol). I was dirt poor at the time but I was suppose to be ‘big’ enough for this financial gap not to bother me, nothin a few drinks couldn’t fix. So, 18 years ago they were making one thousand dollar coach purses, hence the reason I did not bother investigating this flyer further.

My point is, everyone wants quality, coach is a very high quality product so why wouldn’t anyone want a useful, practical product? To live absolute is to supply this for all who have a need for it firstly, then for all who just want one for pleasure. To live absolute would be to delete the brand name, as privately owned for profit company, as why would there be a ‘company’ label on the product, no need because no company.

Certain individuals would make this needed product, from a best for all starting point, so that the product would last ie. 50 years and the product is priced so it is attainable to all who need/want it.  Living absolute would mean the factory workers, who make the purse would be paid an equal wage as all inhabitant of this earth so they have no need to ‘fight’ for higher wages.  They would also live free of a mortgage, rent, utility bills as all necessities would be provided for freely.

Living absolute would mean the factory workers, managers, sales staff, cleaning staff, office staff, etc. would all have equal ‘ownership’ in the purse factory because there would be no ownership! Ownership not required , never was, just one of the many purposefully, confusing economic ‘realities’ of capitalism based on this well documented theory: if you throw enough shit at a wall, some of it will stick.

Can you see the beauty in living absolute?  Less fear results in less illness, results in increased cooperation, results in increased production… Let’s let the snowball of ‘best for all’ roll for awhile.  Another capitalistic lie, there is not enough to go around.

Living absolute mean no separation. So if you are me and I am you, we won’t bother about trying to manipulate

each other by suggesting my purse is better that yours or  I deserve mine and you don’t.  I won’t talk nasty about your purse behind your back because that would be me, using my mind based on  opinions and judgements. Where did I get that opinion? From my mind as a past experience, from what my parents or government told me, or from my mind as learned polarities of good/bad, better/less than, inferior/superior.  To live absolute means to shut down the mind as who and what you are and to live within/from a starting point of always asking ‘what is best for ALL?’ within each and every situation imaginable.’

Is that drastic, severe? Not to me, to me it is drastic to kidnap/hold captive  and repeatedly rape a 4 year old girl, take naked photos of her and videos so other men can jerk off. To me it is severe to starve an innocent little baby for a whole year before it dies, so it only knew suffering and agony for it’s entire ‘life’, when it was totally avoidable/not necessary BUT WE DID NOTHING.

To live absolute means no separation, you are indeed one and equal with all that exists here; humans, animals and the plant kingdom. So your father is my father, there are no separate families or government philosophies, afterall, we are the family of human kind (I use this term with some trepidation).

Why would I judge your purse (as old, unworthy, inferior, better than mine) when I could, just as easily, get one the same or a style that I prefer, if I want/need.  Everything I am saying here would be applied with and within common sense. No one would be allowed 100 coach purses as this would indicate some form of mental confusion and indicate ‘fear’ of lack (using ones mind), that results in the unwarranted act of hoarding.  This would be viewed for what it is , a mental problem that requires correction/assistance.

It may seems silly to use Coach purses as an example of what it means to live absolute but seems just as silly  as any other example to me.  Afterall, coach purses for all, truly would be heaven on earth darling!

It will be interesting to see how human beings treat each other in the probable event that the world’s financial markets do indeed, collapse.  Will they panic and pick up weapons to defend what little they have left?  Will they band together to help their neighbor? There will be much fear and chaos, that is for sure. What would I do?  What does it mean?

I don’t know all it means but I’m going to guess it would mean most-if not all-who have money invested in the stock market or bonds etc. will lose their money, the value of your home would diminish to the point of loss (you owe more than it is worth),  you lose your job, pensions would be lost.  The elite will try to control the many by insisting the world can be re-built on capitalism again but the people will have lost ‘hope’. Good, we will live without it.

So to ‘survive’ this financial collapse will not be a matter of keeping the ‘assets’ and money you have or ‘getting back’ what you have lost. To survive this you must let go of your ideas about assets/property ownership/social classes/hierarchy/ special or privileged groups of people on this planet. We will have to finally (after being forced by losing everything) embrace what Jesus said, ‘Love thy neighbor as thyself’ or vanish as a race by ensuing panic leading to war/famine/disease from our food and water.

To survive this financial collapse will take great courage and honestly, self-honesty.   Each person will have to face himself/herself self honestly, looking at where the current financial system of the world, capitalism, led us and if we really want to create that again and why.

I heard an analogy the other day, that the world was like a big monopoly board and we’re just playing ‘life’ as game.  The winners are clear now, the elite, so ok you won, you’ve got all the property, resources, toys and vacations, all the pleasure, all the pie. The rest of of lost, ok. Lets stop this game and wipe the board clean. We’ll have a break and write some new rules. This time we’ll change the rules.

I would suggest, do not vacate your home or apartment because the banks tell you to. I would not leave unless they picked me up and carried me out. I would have no where, like many, to go. I will stock pile some food, lots of water, matches, batteries and other of the typical survival kit necessities. Will it be used, who knows?

But…most importantly, I will work toward re-building a new system, a new world, which will be based on best for all principals and not who can ‘win’ at the game of life here on earth. I don’t care who can win and I will not accept and allow  a new, ‘improved’ capitalistic system to emerge from the wreckage of a financial collapse. The new world will be based on equality, in fact and not based on charity. All will live as one and equal in harmony with all life, as in nature and the animals. Separation will reign no more, there will be stillness of mind and a real/true peace on earth. Heaven on earth.

Who the hell am I to make such preposterous statements? I am one being here, who is standing up and saying ‘no more’. I am standing up with a group of people at Desteni.Org and we are proposing an Equal Money System for our planet so greed never rules as our god , ever again. If some of this rings true for you, please investigate EqualMoney.Org and join us!

There is good news and bad news to answer these questions with the coming of 2012.

The bad news is, yes, you are truly alone. The savior is none other than yourself. It is what is here. The answer to the world’s problems is so obvious, we have been blinded to what is in front of our own noses.  Why? Because of being lost in our own minds. We have been living as the mind, lost in the mind as the continual stream of consciousness as thoughts, feelings and emotions, memories, pictures in our mind that come up as our own pre-programming that we have created throughout our lives.

What answer would you have wanted? What kind of a ‘loving’ creator would want it’s creation to be dependent, helpless, a slave to a life/existence without effective answers, only ‘going through’ life to ‘learn lessons’ to which you have no ‘proof’ actually exist but you must live on ‘faith’ that it is so.  No, that is not the case as you can plainly ‘see’ in the world in which you live.  Mankind is not ‘evolving’ through lifetime lessons as you can plainly see, there exists today and throughout recorded history, spitefulness, murder, rape, starvation, war, famine, greed, inequality abounds.

So 2012 is the year when the world systems begin to fail us and we must take total responsibility to face ourselves, as the world, and begin to make changes. The savior is yourself because that is all there is. Look, what is here?  Human beings, the plant kingdom, the animal kingdom, the oceans, the sky, and then outward space. It is common sense but we have dwelt in the  private mind thinking our thoughts, feelings, emotions do not connect with all else in existence. This is not the case, all of what you resonate as, the past, present and future is indeed a ‘living’ part of the whole that creates reality.

What kind of a savior, at the pearly gates, says, ‘Let’s review your life. You lived in self interest only and did not act in the best interest of anyone but your tiny circle of family and friends. You ignored the suffering of the rest of humanity. Oh, ok, no problem, carry on.’  I would say a creator that is not benevolent and believes in ‘specialness’ and separation-JUST AS HUMAN BEINGS DO. That is a nasty game, what if you were one of those people who suffered a horrible life and death, or your child or parent? Why would you ‘follow/trust/worship’ a creator who did not care, who was no better than yourself/your ‘sins’?

It is frightening indeed to think that you are alone but it is also empowering because you are alone in the first ‘step’ part of your awakening only.  You will awaken, in fact, to the truth that you are not separate but one and equal to all other human beings = their pain is your pain. This is why we must heed the words, ‘Love thy neighbor as thyself’ because you are ‘thy neighbor’.

In stopping the mind you will awaken, you will begin a journey of becoming life from the physical and understand and realize the only solution to what is here is to do what is best for all. That is the common sense answer to heaven on earth.

2012 is the beginning of the end of separation, no more above and below but ‘as above, so below’ will become real. No more heaven & earth but heaven ON earth, as human beings learn to live one breath at a time, out of the mind of separation and back to the physical as ‘here’ in reality. No more carrying the past, present and future as imagined thoughts, memory but acceptance of what is real.

The first practical step to achieve this, each human becoming the savior, is the implementation of an Equal Money System. Level the playing field for all human beings here. A new starting point of equality to then move forward.

In conclusion, the savior is ‘here’. The savior is you. Alone is a word, alone is a thought. Be the solution as part of the whole. Fear is not real when you face it head on. Take responsibility for your earth, for what you have created. There are several beings at Desteni walking this process of awakening, please join us in BEING THE SAVIOR!

January 2011

2011 – First Blog: My Process at Deteni

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/01/06/first-blog-my-process-at-desteni-journal-jan-411/

2011 – my process…SHUT UP

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/01/07/my-process-shut-up/

2011 – Loser and Gossip

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/01/10/loser-and-gossip/

2011 – Humiliation and the Money System

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/01/11/humiliation-and-the-money-system/

2011 – Good Intentions

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/01/11/good-intentions/

2011 – How I am not real…I change moment to moment

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/01/13/how-i-am-not-real-i-change-moment-to-moment/

2011 – My master fear shouts ‘hurry up’

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/01/14/my-master-fear-shouts-hurry-up/

2011 – hate and murder…it’s right there inside of me

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/01/19/hate-and-murder-its-right-there-inside-of-me/

2011 – News:  Horrible images of the dead but I am numb

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/01/20/news-horrible-images-of-the-dead-but-i-am-numb/

2011 – Egomania

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/01/23/egomania/

2011 – Fear of Standing Up

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/01/23/fear-of-standing-up/

2011 – A Disaplined Life

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/01/25/a-disciplined-life/

2011 – The Existing Money System and Debt

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/01/28/the-existing-money-system-and-debt/

February 2011

2011 – Fear of Attack:  My Process with Desteni

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/02/05/fear-of-attack-my-process-with-desteni/

2011 – My Friend Pika:  Process, A First

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/02/07/my-friend-pika-process-a-first/

2011 – I Am One Vote For World Equality

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/02/08/i-am-one-vote-for-world-equality/

2011 – Self Trust & Common Sense

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/02/12/self-trust-common-sence/

2011 – Joy

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/02/14/joy/

2011 – Sugar Addiction

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/02/17/sugar-addiction/

2011 – Starting to Experience Life

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/02/23/starting-to-experience-life/

2011 – Why on Earth-lyrics

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/02/27/why-on-earth-by-sandy-jones-and-peter-linesman/

March 2011

2011 – Dropping the Ball and Chain

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/03/04/dropping-the-ball-and-chain/

2011 – Exploiting Cheap Labor: Does Ignorant = Innocent?

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/03/08/exploiting-cheap-labour-does-ignorant-innocent/

2011 – Comparison; Woman Against Woman

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/03/10/comparison-woman-against-woman/

2011 – Process: Changes

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/03/14/process-changes/

April 2011

2011 – Process: Facing my Fears…uh oh…Huge Step Back

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/04/12/process-facing-my-fears-uh-oh-huge-step-back/

2011 – I Fear Smoking: Self Forgiveness

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/04/12/process-facing-my-fears-uh-oh-huge-step-back/

2011 – I Fear Losing Money:  Self Forgiveness

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/04/12/process-facing-my-fears-uh-oh-huge-step-back/

2011 – Are We Not ALL Princes Among Men?

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/04/21/are-we-all-not-princes-among-men/

May 2011

2011 – Al-Queda Recruits: What am I  Missing Here?

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/05/01/al-queda-recruits-what-am-i-missing-here/

2011 – My Experience with the Real Estate Career Scam

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/05/03/my-experience-with-the-real-estate-career-sham/

2011 – Canadian Election Shocker:  Hope for future equality…in the future

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/05/03/canadian-election-surprise-hope-for-future-equality-in-the-future/

2011 – Why didn’t I take my Kids to Cool ‘Singalong’ Classes when They were Young?

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/05/14/why-didnt-i-take-my-kids-to-cool-singalong-classes-when-they-were-young/

2011 – I Hate My Husband;   Anger/Blame

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/05/17/i-hate-my-husband-angerblame/

2011 – The End is Here, yes the end of BS with an Equal Money System

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/05/21/the-end-is-here-yes-the-end-of-bs-with-an-equal-money-system/

2011 – Banking: Price Increases…Insatiable Greed

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/05/31/banking-price-increases-no-one-asked-me/

2011 – Sport:  Competition Destroys the Self Esteem of the large majority of our Children

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/05/31/sport-competition-destroys-the-self-esteem-of-large-majority-of-our-children/

2011 – Music:  Beyonce Is A Bully

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/05/31/music-beyonce-is-a-bully/

June 2011

2011 – Why Sex Sells

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/06/10/why-sex-sells/

2011 – Mind Control – Cult – Beware !

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/06/10/mind-control-cult-beware/

2011 – MultiNational Greed and the Ugly Result

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/06/11/multinational-greed-and-the-ugly-result/

2011 – Causes of Poverty-Shocking Worldwide Statistics

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/06/14/causes-of-poverty-worldwide-statistics-shocking/

2011 – Vanity & Me:  Self Forgiveness on the Beauty System

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/06/24/vanity-me-process-self-forgiveness-on-the-beauty-system/

2011 – Realizations!  Fear of Aging

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/06/25/realizations-fear-of-aging/

July 2011

2011 – Why I Stand for Equal Money and World Equality

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/07/01/why-i-stand-for-equal-money-and-world-equality/

2011 – Emotions and Re-defining ‘Beauty’

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/07/02/emotions-and-re-defining-beauty/

2011 – Where ‘God’ led me:  An Exurpt from a Case Study on Alcoholism

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/07/17/where-god-led-me-an-exurpt-from-a-casestudyblog-on-alcoholism/

2011 – Loss:  What I now realize.  What I will now accept and what I will not accept.

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/07/17/loss-what-i-now-realize-what-i-will-and-will-not-accept-and-allow/

2011 – The Road To Hell is Paved With Good Intentions

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/07/26/the-road-to-hell-is-paved-with-good-intentions/

2011 – Quantum Self Realizations

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/07/26/quantum-self-realizations/

August 2011

2011 – Jealousy:  My Sister got the Family Cottage

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/08/15/jealousy-my-sister-got-the-family-cottage/

2011 – Regret:  The talk with my Dad

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/08/16/regret-the-talk-with-my-dad/

2011 – Trigger Points:  Self Forgiveness and Self Corrective Statements

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/08/17/trigger-points-self-forgiveness-and-corrective-statement/

2011 – Life as Survival of the Fittest Versus Life in an Equal Money System

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/08/21/life-as-survival-of-the-fittest-versus-life-within-an-equal-money-system/

2011 – Equal Money is Not Communism

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/08/21/equal-money-is-not-communism/

Septmeber 2011 

2011 – What Happens when I Accept an Idea of ‘God’?

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/09/06/what-happens-when-i-accept-an-idea-of-god/

2011 – Experiences Keep Us Stuck

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/09/08/experiences-keep-us-stuck/

2011 – Self Forgiveness:  Self Sabotage:  The point of Inferiority

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/09/21/self-forgiveness-self-sabotage-the-point-of-inferiority/

2011 – Self Forgiveness:  Self Sabotage:  Assumptions

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/09/22/self-forgiveness-self-sabotage-assumptions/

2011 – Self Forgiveness Book:  Childhood:  Thought Patterns

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/09/28/self-forgiveness-book-childhoodthought-patterns/

October  2011

2011 – Childhood Patterns:  Inhibitions

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/10/02/childhood-patterns-inhibition/

2011 – Poverty & Pregnancy

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/10/06/poverty-and-pregnancy/

2011 – Childhood Memories:  Humiliation

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/10/08/childhood-memories-humiliation/

2011 – Self Forgiveness:  Childhood Memories:  Submissive Women

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/10/14/sf-childhood-memories-submissive-women/

2011- Unplanned Pregnancy & Equal Money

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/10/16/unplannedunwanted-pregnancy-and-equal-money/

2011 – FAQ:  Will Indigenous People Preserve their ‘Rights’ to live Outside the System?

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/10/25/will-indigenous-people-preserve-their-rights-to-live-outside-of-the-system/

2011 – FAQ Equal Money:  Will I have to Wait in Line for Bread?

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/10/27/faq-equal-money-will-i-have-to-wait-in-line-for-bread/

2011 – The Future of Money 2012:  Will There Be Banks in an Equal Money System?

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/10/29/the-future-of-money-2012-will-there-be-banks-in-an-equal-money-system/

November 2011

2011 – Self Forgiveness on Childhood:  Thought Patterns:  Fear of Men

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/11/03/self-forgiveness-on-childhood-fear-of-men-thought-patterns/

2011 – Process:  Letting Go of my Relationship Personality

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/11/04/process-letting-go-of-my-relationship-personality/

2011 – Self Forgiveness:  Thought Patterns:  Boyfriends

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/11/07/self-forgiveness-boyfriends-thought-patterns/

2011 – Self Forgiveness:  High School Girlfriends

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/11/10/self-forgiveness-high-school-girlfriends/

2011 – Self Forgiveness:  Thought Patterns:   Family-In-Laws

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/11/13/sf-thought-patterns-family-in-laws/

2011 – Self Forgiveness:  Thought Patterns:  My Father’s Drinking

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/11/20/self-forgiveness-childhood-memories-thought-patterns-my-fathers-drinking/

2011 – FAQ:  Equal money System:  Are you just going to print cash?

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/11/20/faq-equal-money-system-are-you-going-to-just-print-cash/

2011 – FAQ:  Equal Money System:  Will there be Euthanasia?

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/11/20/faq-equal-money-system-will-there-be-euthanasia/

2011 – FAQ:  Equal Money System 2020:  BIG (Basic Income Grant)

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/11/20/faq-equal-money-system-2020-basic-income-grant/

2011 – Process:  Fantasies of Older Men: Realizations and Self Corrective Statements

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/11/27/so-many-men-so-little-time-realizations-and-self-corrective-statements-re-fantasies/

December 2011

2011 – Self Forgiveness:  Thought Patterns:  Teen/Young Adult

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/12/07/memories-thought-patterns-self-forgiveness/

2011 – FAQ:  Equal Money System 2020:  No more cheap glasses that ruin your eyes!

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/12/07/faq-equal-money-system-2020-no-more-cheap-glasses-that-ruin-your-eyes/

2011 – FAQ:  The End of Weapons Production with Equal Money

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/12/10/faq-the-end-of-weapons-production-with-equal-money/

2011 – FAQ:  Equal Money System 2020:  No More OWS (Occupy Wall Street)

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/12/12/faq-equal-money-system-2020-no-more-owsoccupy-wall-street/

2011 – FAQ:  Equal Money System 2020:  Free World Travel

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/12/12/faq-equal-money-system-2020-free-world-travel/

2011 – FAQ:  Equal Money System 2020:  No more Deepak Chopra

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/12/13/faq-equal-money-system-2020no-more-deepak-chopra/

2011 – Self Forgiveness on Use of Sleep Aids

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/12/24/self-forgiveness-on-use-of-sleep-aids/

2011 – Self Forgiveness on Alcoholism

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2011/12/30/self-forgiveness-on-alcoholism/

January 2012

2012 – Self Forgiveness on ‘Happy” Childhood Memories

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2012/01/02/self-forgiveness-on-happy-childhood-memories/

2012 – Self Forgiveness As Last Life

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2012/01/05/self-forgiveness-as-last-life/

2012 – Self Forgiveness As Another:  The Money System

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2012/01/06/self-forgiveness-as-another-the-money-system/

2012 – Self Forgiveness As Another:  Parents, siblings, world systems, other

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2012/01/08/2011-self-forgiveness-as-another-parents-siblings-world-systems-other/

2012 – Self Forgiveness:  Karma

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2012/01/08/self-forgiveness-karma/

2012 – Self Forgiveness on Magic:  The Role of Time

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2012/01/10/self-forgiveness-on-magic-the-role-of-time/

2012 – 2012 Why I Could Hear the Desteni Message

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2012/01/21/2012-why-i-could-hear-the-desteni-message/

2012 – 2012 Is it more than a Prediction? Is it the End?

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2012/01/20/2012-is-it-more-than-a-prediction-is-it-the-end/

2012 – 2012 Are you truly Alone? Where is the Savior?

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2012/01/24/2012-are-you-truly-alone-where-is-the-savior/

2012 – 2012: Facing the Religion of Self

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2012/01/27/2012-facing-the-religion-of-self/

February 2012

2012 – 2012: What Does it Mean to Live Absolute?

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2012/02/07/2012-what-does-it-mean-to-live-absolute/

2012 – 2012:  Will You Survive the Financial Collapse?

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2012/02/07/2012-will-you-survive-the-financial-collapse/

2012 – Eckhart Tolle’s New Earth:  Did I take that seriously?

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2012/02/21/2012-eckhart-tolles-new-earth-did-i-take-that-seriously/

2012 – History of the Interdimentional Portal

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2012/02/23/history-of-the-interdimentional-porta/

March 2012

2012 – Wayne Dyer’s ‘Power of Intention’ What Purpose Does it Serve?

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2012/03/03/2012-wayne-dyers-the-power-of-intention-what-purpose-does-it-serve/

2012 – Economics: Ownership: The Lie that Kills

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2012/03/05/economics-ownership-the-lie-that-kills/

2012 – Secrets of Masturbation: Why even talk about it? Isn’t anything private anymore?

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2012/03/08/secrets-of-masturbation-why-even-talk-about-this-isnt-anything-private-anymore/

2012 – ‘A Course in Miracles’ :  The miracle did nothing to improve my life

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2012/03/06/2012-a-course-in-miracles-the-miracle-did-not-improve-my-life/

2012 – Voices in the Mind are Deception Not a Higher Power

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2012/03/31/voices-in-the-mind-are-deception-not-a-higher-power/

April 2012

2012 – W. Dyer:  Looking at “The Power Of Intention”

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2012/04/05/w-dyer-looking-at-the-power-of-intention/

2012 – Re-defining Education:  Social Develpment 1 to 6 months

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2012/04/09/re-education-social-development-1-to-6-months/

2012 – Healing Resentment: I’m So Pissed at My Husband!

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2012/04/09/healing-resentment-im-so-pissed-at-my-husband/

2012 – Sandy’s Journey To Life:  Day 1:  Resistance

http://sandysjourneytolife.wordpress.com/2012/04/27/sandys-journey-to-life-day-1-resistance/

2012 – Sandy’s Journey To Life:  Day 2:  Failed Relationships

http://sandysjourneytolife.wordpress.com/2012/04/29/sandys-journey-to-life-day-2-failed-relationships/

May 2012

2012 – Day 3:  I Hate that Rich Bitch:  Facing Jealousy, Regret, Spite

https://sandymacgillivray.wordpress.com/2012/05/07/day-3-i-hate-that-rich-bitch-jealousy-regret-spite/

2012   Day 4: Failed Relationships: Facing My Father

http://sandysjourneytolife.wordpress.com/2012/05/11/day-4-failed-relationships-beginning-facing-my-father/

2012 – Day 5: Failed Relationships: Facing my Father 2

http://sandysjourneytolife.wordpress.com/2012/05/13/day-5-failed-relationships-facing-my-father-2/

2012 – Day 6: Failed Realtionships: My Mom: Being Bitchy to Store Clerks and My Partner

http://sandysjourneytolife.wordpress.com/2012/05/16/day-6-failed-relationships-my-mom/

2012 – Day 7: Facing my Father 3 : Little Girls are Inferior

http://sandysjourneytolife.wordpress.com/2012/05/18/day-7-facing-my-father-3-little-girls-are-inferior/

2012 – Day 8:  Failed Relationships: Rushing

http://sandysjourneytolife.wordpress.com/2012/05/23/day-8-failed-relationships-rushing/

2012 – Day 9: Personality Patterns: I Am Mom

http://sandysjourneytolife.wordpress.com/2012/05/26/day-9-personality-patterns-i-am-mom/

2012 – Day 10: Personality Patterns: I Am Mom the Protector

http://sandysjourneytolife.wordpress.com/2012/05/28/day-10-my-mom-personality-cont/

June 2012

2012 – Day 11: Mom as the possession of Worry

http://sandysjourneytolife.wordpress.com/2012/06/02/day-11-personalities-mom-as-the-possession-of-worry/

2012 – Day 12: Me as Mom: Summer Camp for the Rich

http://sandysjourneytolife.wordpress.com/2012/06/06/day-12-me-as-mom-summer-camp-for-the-rich/

2012 – Day 13: Facing Me as Mom: The Wicked Wealthy Ski Chalet

http://sandysjourneytolife.wordpress.com/2012/06/09/day-13-facing-personalities-mom-exclusive-ski-chalet/

There are two main reasons why I could hear the Desteni message.

First, there were many things I suppressed from childhood and young adulthood that Desteni spoke about in a common sense way that I found to be validating and awakened my, long since abandoned, sense of  self-trust.  Why do we blatantly ignore the suffering and death of so many millions of helpless children and obviously vulnerable people in our world?  Why do we not change our systems of economy and distribution of food and goods and services so this is corrected?  Why do we throw our hands in the air and say it is impossible to feed/take care of each other as one family? Why do people get pissed off when I try to talk about it? Why do we not see the evil of capitalism? Why do we spend trillions of dollars on an arms race that can never be ‘won’?  Why is ‘God’ unfair? Why do we die? Why is it not ‘right’ to question ‘God’?  Does God want children born with cerebral palsy? Why should I think/accept this is a loving God? Who’s God is ‘right’?   Why don’t the people who live with extreme abundance share with others the have nothing  and say one should learn and earn, yet they pass down this wealth from generation to generation-through a bull shit excuse called ‘birthright’?  Why don’t we change the rules to what is best for all ? I could go on and on and on.

Desteni does not manipulate and discuss these and several other issues with a silver tongue or kid gloves, neither in self interest. This group tackles these ‘difficult’ issue head on, no mincing of words. I appreciated that right away and felt empowered because I wanted answers to the devastation I saw in my world. Desteni does not offer information without a solution, I appreciated that too.  Desteni advocates for an Equal Money System to be implemented in our world.  Equality, real equality. Ok, I thought, I’ll keep reading and listening to these video interviews. Some of the interviews were done through a portal. The reason I had no problem with the portal, after I watched a few and accepted they were valid, is my second reason I could hear the Desteni message, which I will discuss shortly.

I watched the Jesus interviews and Audrey Hepburn interviews first. I have not reviewed them for awhile but what sticks with me is they were both consistent with the main message.  They both spoke about self responsibility and that human beings had ‘missed the mark’ regarding what is important in life-we have life ‘upside down’. Basically, that each person is responsible for the mess we have created here on earth, as a whole, and that each and every one must face themselves, see/be aware of self, apply self forgiveness and walk the self corrective path in each moment of each breath, if we are to make the changes necessary to survive.

Jesus said we are all the same, including himself, although he came to earth with a knowing and understanding and ‘seeing’ ability that we do not have, at this time . Unfortunately, his simple message of ‘love they neighbor as thyself’ and ‘do unto others as you would have them do unto you’ has not been heeded.  Now that all made sense to me. Audrey Hepburn drove home for me that, I too, am guilty, by participation and acceptance, of all the worlds current problems. I wanted to point fingers, still do, and blame and hate and be angry but as I learn to stand as one as all as equal this does not make sense and must be stopped, within myself first, that is my responsibility.

The second reason I listened to Desteni was I had experienced problems with my mind. I had experienced/heard voices in my head and listened to them until I was quite insane. I could not sleep and was barely able to function. I medicated myself with alcohol but then became an alcoholic. These voices seemed to ‘know’ things that were impossible and predicted things that quickly came true, several unexplainable things occurred to me over the years, the voices/communication terrified me at night so I also took sleep medication. I was able to ‘pull my self back together’ over a number of years so I was, once again, a  fully functional human being but subsequently questioned the sanity of ‘believing in/worshiping/trusting’ a creator that could produce such a fuck up. It was not that ‘difficult’ to become broken after all, it was not such extreme behavior that led to my ‘sickness’. I had obsessed, gone into, delved into my mind too deeply is all. Not suggesting that is the proper thing to do, of course it is not, but I thought no wonder so many people are mentally ill!  And so many people sadly kill themselves when hearing voices. So tragic and unecessary. I stopped the voices by simply stopping my mind=I did not listen to thoughts!  The booze helped tremendously ( sober 8 years now) and then belief in a ‘higher power’=spiritualism but mostly I did not listen to my mind and engage in the act of ‘thinking’ and it literally stopped the insanity. This occurred slowly over several years. But then, the question, ‘ what and why had this happened to me?’

I never went the medical-traditional route. They have little understanding of the mind. Thank god I didn’t. I would have been labled schizophrenic and given pills. I understand I self medicated. And I’m sure years of therapy with people who do not know about the mind!  They would try to ‘figure it out’ my mind/the mind.  I would have felt humiliated and ‘less than’. Desteni has make me  realize I am whole now, I need not ‘ascend’ any spiritual steps, I need not listen to or ‘figure out’ my mind.

So when I found the Desteni site I soon discovered they spoke about and explained the mind!  What a huge relief to me to find out I wasn’t crazy and wasn’t broken or I hadn’t crossed some spiritual line that was sacred. I was completely validated in that the mind is a program and everything in existence is in me already. Desteni has shown me that I had accessed -by mistake- thoughts that have been programmed into me and that it is not my ‘fault’ but it is my responsibility to stop the mind as it is not ‘life’ and is in fact what has caused all the fuck ups in this world through participating in thoughts, feelings and emotions. I do not need to be a slave to my ‘personality’ or my pre-programmed life, that is not who I am.

I am life ‘here’ in this moment of breath and I am learning to live this way. It is a process that is challenging but giving my life meaning beyond anything I ever imagined. I am becoming free of what I thought I was slave to: society, religion, being a woman in a man’s world, feeling alone in what I considered an insane world, fear of death, fear of poverty-or more accurately being middle class slave, addiction, fear of standing up/speaking up, fear of life, fear of myself-not being able to trust myself .

I trust myself more and more. Desteni has given me this, invaluable!

Thank you Desteni. I stand with you. I am one vote for an Equal Money System and World Equality!