Posts Tagged ‘Somalia’

Love and light, love and light, isn’t it wonderful?

Not so much if you’re an 16 year old orphaned girl(parents dead from Aids) HIV infected, with 2 young sisters and you have to labor  in a hot, dry field 9 hours a day just to scrounge a few coins to feed yourself and your sisters the bare minimum. You fall into bed in a basically empty mud hut with your sisters crying, huddling together on makeshift bed, you lay on the dirt floor and give the girls the only blanket, in fear of what tomorrow will bring. The neighbors and community feel sorry but cannot help but a little now and then. How will you face it all again tomorrow?  No hope for a better future, no dreams of boyfriends or even school, you just ‘pray’ the girls don’t get sick again. You cry yourself to sleep. This girl’s name is Seraphene. I learned about her story many years ago at a World Vision fund raiser. I saw the film of her and her home and her little sisters.  I have no idea what happened to them.

I found Deepak’s home on  Please take a look. A palatial mansion with swimming pool and tennis courts  and no doubt a whole lot more.  I have nothing against the man personally, he is but one example of a world gone mad; living in self interest and self justification, creating ‘many mansions’ in his mind…er sorry… in the sky for Seraphene and her sister’s when they have learnt all their ‘lessons’ in this world and pass onto the next.  Note: Since posting this blog a woman from Chopra’s office, named Carolyn made a comment, you can read below and then e-mailed, saying this is not Chopra’s home. Ok, I asked where is his home or a photo so I can correct the blog, how many homes does he have and where ?(obviously, I did not mean the exact address, which she claim she took my request as). She never responded. I don’t know , does it matter at all? I mean the guy’s a multi-multi-millionaire. Could be that mansion or another.  Abundance versus Starvation. Deepak versus One BILLION  * that’s 1000,000,000 people starving or without food today!  Tragic. Perhaps all the positive thinking will magically feed them. So sad, so tragic, so uneccessary. Charity will not effectively correct this disgusting problem. Nor will ‘positive’ messages and thinking, wake the F up people!

Deepak Chopra is an Indian American writer and public speaker, best known for covering topics such as spirituality and mind-body medicine.

His estimated net worth according to is a cool 75 million American dollars.Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...

Hmm…this about sums it up, from Wikipedia;

Chopra is as rich as he is today … because his basic message — that love, health and happiness are possible, that mystery is real and that the universe is ultimately a friendly and benevolent place where orthodoxies old and new can meet and make peace with one another — is one that he wants to believe in just as sincerely as his readers do.”[1][2]

Well, isn’t that just the bees knees, all wrapped up neat and tidy so he can sleep in his designer sheets tonight. And the universe is benevolent you say, well I am an ass, I thought little children were dying in agony tonight from starvation–tell them that.  Will your words sooth them, will your charity reach them, heal them?  I think not.

In an Equal Money System you will not have to put up with such nonsense as these guru’s spread their ‘love and light’ messages. It is not working , clearly.  Nothing but equality will be tolerated, all will be given equal opportunity to ‘spread their wings’ not just a few.  All will be provided a home with clean water, a safe neighborhood,  food, healthcare, clothing, transportation, education and of the highest quality. Nothing but the best will be made ! Not one deserving or receiving more than another- because equal is equal is equal. You can’t manipulate it , you can’t fake it, you can’t fudge it, you can’t hide it. All will be known, nothing is owned but used respectfully while we are here.  This is our earth, this is our home.

Please investigate EqualMoney.Org

1 Tompkins, Ptolemy (2008-11-14). “”Time”, New Age Supersage, Ptolemy Tompkins, November 14, 2008″. Retrieved 2011-02-18.

2. ^ a b TNN, Apr 15, 2001, 02.04pm IST (2001-04-15). “The Times of India, Halyeema Sayed, The Mind-Body, April 15, 2001”. Retrieved 2011-02-18.

According to Wikipedia as of this articles date BIG, a Basic Income Grant  is “…an unconditional government-insured guarantee that all citizens will have enough income to meet their basic needs.”

It will take several years of re-education before an Equal Money system is possible in this world. As everyone will agree, many, many people are suffering horribly on earth currently. So to alleviate the suffering and allow people the opportunity to  get out of a `survival`mentality, BIG will be sufficient to stabilize ones life. In fact the  Basic Income Grant is suggested and recommended  by those who advocate for an Equal Money System.

Once a person no longer has to focus just on survival as in  shelter, food, clothing, water one can expand ones awareness to just how extensive the abuse has become on earth.  With a basic income grant cost such as and including:  rent, mortgage, electricity, heat, clean water, food, health care, clothing and transportation would be covered. This is not an equal money system but a first step towards what we will create as actual heaven on earth.

With the implementation of BIG, there will still be rich and poor, better than less than, charity, polarities of all kinds, war, abuse from those ìn power who have the wealth, no power to stop the trillions of dollars allocated to space programs, the war machine ie. fighter jets, the latest hollywood film in which the ‘star’ gets paid 10 million dollars, the baseball player signed on for 50 million dollars per year, deception, profit and loss.

Yet, it is difficult to impossible to ponder let alone participate in a solution when you are trying to survive . Perhaps you have others who are depending on you for their survival as well, children, elderly parents. You get up at dawn, work you ass off, come home to other important obligations and fall into bed knowing you are trapped, there is no money left (you`re behind in bills, debt= the biggest evilest scam of all time) for you to take a vacation with your family, buy something for the home or children.

It`s time we look at this : money is not real, its an idea, designed for trade. Well then we can re-design it since it is not working best for all . It only supports the few with a life worth living.

We all breath the same air people, we are all born with nothing on our backs. We all need to eat and we all shit! Equally. We`re just making it up as we go along. Stop. Lets re-think, re-design, WTF, how is your faith and love working. I say:  don`t shut up, stand up, stand-up now!

BIG will be a start in the right direction.  Please investigate EqualMoney.Org  & to learn more!

I looked up the word ‘bank’ in the dictionary (not thinking about it too much) expecting to find: financial institution, place where the public keeps their money, blah, blah, blah…Instead I found the following:

bank 04/11/11

1. a long pile or heap; mass: a bank of earth; a bank of clouds.

2 a slope or acclivity

3  Physical Geography. the slope immediately bordering a streamcourse along      which the water normally runs.

4. a broad elevation of the sea floor around which the water is relatively shallow but not a hazard to surface navigation.
5 .Coal Mining. the surface around the mouth of a shaft.
It seems to me the commonality most of these definitions have is that a bank is an elevation or foundation of some part of the natural earth.  Hmm, well now that is interesting because I would have given bank the following definition:
Bank:  A place where I am told ‘no’. A place where I am humiliated. I place where I feel no one sincerely cares but put on fake smiles and a supposed helpful demeanour but I understand their ‘hands are tied’ as they ‘just work there’. A place where I feel shitty that, although I hate them, I am wrought with guilt because they are the pawns behind the cowards..I mean powerful players of the corporation (you know the ones who have billions of dollars and never show their face, I wonder how much their mortgage is ?…oh , nothing, that’s right. I wonder how much they pay in tax? …oh again nothing. they know all the ways to cheat but they do not call it cheating).
Anyway, back to the question. Will there be banks in an Equal Money System? (EMS)
No, not as you think of a bank now. One would assume that money and  banks go together but in an EMS they do not.  The banks role has purely been of  a service provider, making a profit from controlling the movement of money. However, within an EMS, the incentive to make profit will no longer exist and therefore the need for banks will no longer exist.

Money, itself, will not be owned. The only thing that will be owned will be life!  Everyone will receive equal money from birth to death.  In practicality, we will utilize the electronic infrastructure currently in place in the world as a monitoring system, which means you will be given credits on a card, say monthly, each one receiving the same, and use these credits at various stores to get all the goods and services you and your family require. So this card is  simply a tool used to trade in a responsible, accountable fashion.  Hence, money will be purely the accounting tool used to plan, implement and coordinate the details of  the division of resources at an individual and a global scale .

You won’t need to ‘pay for’ anything. You deserve all that is here for ‘free’ as you are one and equal to it. It does not matter where you are born, to what family, what history your family had. We do not put value on life as each other nor on food we produce, plants, animals, mountains, oceans nor the sky nor the rain. Time for us to wake up, all is free to roam the earth and enjoy what is here within a ‘best for all’ awareness and responsibility.

Wouldn’t it be great if banks could be transformed into community centers? A practical tool, a place to gather and support each other to become effective as individuas and as a community.

What was the common theme in dictionary definitions of ‘bank’ ?  An elevation or foundation of some part of the natural earth. The earth, home, the dust we come from and return to.  

Bank: new definition:  a natural part of the earth, a place to gather and share how to live ‘best for all’ principals, a place that lifts one up, gives one stability to grow as life, a place to support each other in all aspect of and as community, a place of togetherness as the new earthling.

Free yourself from the voice in the head that has taught you to become a ‘good’ consumer slave . Please join us at

What is a breadline anyway? A breadline is a line a of people waiting to receive food given by a charitable or public agency. This food is free for prople who have no money, often due to unemployment, as during the Great Depression.

No, there will be no breadlines in an Equal Money System (EMS). It will not be a system of scarcity. Scarcity is what we have now but it is a lie! Visions of breadlines are what the world governments and corporations would like you to think will occur, when the world changes to a system of equality, so you stay in your place, way behind the wealthy, and don’t demand change. They want you in fear so you remain paralyzed and powerless.

There is much fear around the idea of not charging people for food= ‘paying a price’, like we will run out or go broke.  Nothing could be further from the truth,  we have already figured out all the ways to mass produce food, on very little land, in controlled enviroments where no seasons have any influence. It can be done on a worldwide scale, we currently have all the technology for this ‘miracle’ to occur.  And we see the evidence of this already today, in our grocery stores .  Behold, the beautiful, genetically modified fruits and vegetables.  Most justly, much of the land now used for farming will become the home of the animals again!

Wouldn’t it be great if part of a young persons education was spent on a farm practically learning how to produce food. Since food is a basic human need why not make it a basic educational requirement, to live on a farm in a commune style for a few years , taking responsibility for food production on a global scale. We will do this for the children to come, so that when they sit around the campfire listening to stories from the ‘elders’ talking of the days when humans would see a starving child and just walk on by, not giving it another thought- they are in shock and disbelief because life is so utterly different for them. Their littles eyes will bulge in horror, ‘Really, but they cared, they came back, right?’  ‘No.. for a moment or two they cared but they left the little child alone to die, in agony, no one ever came back.’ This is the legacy now.  Let it be that the above example is considered disgusting, inexcusable, murder ! Never, ever to happen again!

Food production is a simple repetitive formula of planting, tending to with water and nourishment and harvesting, nothing need be re-invented. It is a cycle that repeats itself and all the knowledge necessary to have successful, sufficient food production  for our world already exists.  There are enough existing farms on the earth now, none need be added to produce enough for all.

Some foods and food products will no longer be needed so not produced. Since competition and brands will  no longer exist, several products won’t be made (that had no nutritional value or worse had negative effects on our health) they were only ever made for profit not to feed/nouish. Since profit motive is eliminated, we will simply produce quality foods that are the best for all.  Since much stress will be eliminated, we will not feel the need to overeat and become obese in such vast numbers and alternatively, mental illnesses such as eating disorders, will appear less and less in the human.

I suppose you may have to line up a few minutes at a grocery store, as you do now, but this should even be more efficient as there will be no exchange of money, you are able to take what you and your family require for nutrition and cooking enjoyment.

Much of the earth will return to it’s natural condition as the world rests and breathes and re-births itself.  An EMS will be the end of the human and the beginning of the earthling!

 The implementation of an Equal Money System (EMS) will be a process. Part of that process will be changing the current world systems (the banking system, the health care system, the education system etc) to what is best for all.  An EMS, at it’s core, supports all human life, as one as equal, and in that no one person, race, culture gets treated differently than another, advocating all deserve their needs met, to survive and thrive with dignity and respect, in this world.

People have different needs and at varying times of their life and in various regions according to climate, geographical conditions, and ease of access so there are many considerations. Therefore, a group of people may have special needs to be met that vary with other people but this will be dealt with on an ongoing and ‘as needed’ basis not because of what occurred in past history of this world. We can learn from history, in a practical way, without carrying an unnecessary load of knowledge and information, of memories and emotions-we will take into consideration just what it needed in the present and necessary to support life now.

No decisions, changes will be made according to the past as ‘compensation’ for past mistakes/injustices/ except for using a common sense approach as in what works and what doesn’t. We, as  the human race have all suffered and we all need to stand as one as equal, to fix the problems that face our world.

Therefore, we as the human race must honor each life, no longer in separation, … are separate from me so I live in self interest and ultimatly care about what is best for me ( and my family ) and your life has no effect on mine. No, we are all not only connected but live equal and one which means decisions are made on a ‘what is best for all’ basis. So if there are practices in place that are ‘working’ that when looked at from a ‘best for all’ stand point, then they will remain. Perhpas they will be altered over time, perhaps they will be implemented in a wider geographical area for more of the population, perhaps they will fade out, whatever is best for all of humanity and not just Indigenous people.

Let’s look at a few practical examples: jobs/university/housing

If there was legislation in place that specified Indigeous people would be hired on certain projects, to make up for a certain % of the total work force required, this would no longer be in place. Understand, one will not have to work for money=income. Each person will receive equal money per week/month/year in credits/earth dollars (whatever name is given the currency) so each Indigenous person will receive exactly the same as Brad Pitt-from birth to death-really! Do both of these people have equal access to all of the needed goods and services?  Are they both able to purchase what they want and require for their household? Do they both have the same opportunity to choose how they want to express themselves (ie. work=service or hobby), whether it be in building houses, painting houses, painting the landscape, working with animals etc.?   In the early stages of equal money, probably not and this will be addressed in other equal money writings.  Needless to say,  work will not be defined the way it is now.

Another example would be if there is a manditory requirement for universities to accept a certain % of Indigenous Peoples into certain programs or for the ‘standard’ to be different, such as lower grades required, or the cost to attend is lower. This would no longer be in place/law because schools such as these would have no cost to attend. The entire school system would have changes implemented over time but in an EMS there would be no ‘tuition’ cost, cost for materials/text books etc. that is now part of the regular /accepted/norm post secondary education system in, for example, Canada.

True free choice will open up (now choice is dependent on/restricted by how much money one has) so many will choose not to attend a regular school but to learn something different that truely intersts them.

Another example of  ‘rights’ that are possibly, currently in place to live outside the system that will no longer be necessary is;  reduced income tax, property tax, sales tax, and reduced fee for service such as public transportation. The need for these ‘rights’ will be eliminated by an equal money system because there will be no system of taxation and if a certain credit/amount is required to pay for transportation , everyone will  have the same amount to start with each month so all will be able to afford it.

I am one vote for an Equal Money System. Please join us.

When researching pregnancy, especially in ‘developed’ countries, one of the main concerns that comes up is teen pregnancy as unwanted/unplanned pregnancy and the resulting poverty that often occurs. Often the young woman ends up raising the child herself, is from a lower income , does not have post secondary education or the funds available to pursue such which could limit her future earning potential, so she and her unborn child are vulnerable on several fronts.

There are young women in North America who romanticize the idea of having a baby, on their own or with their teen boyfriend and see it as a badge of honor or ‘a way out’. I have seen these young women on various tv shows who believe life will be different for them, they will not be ‘like their parents’. It clearly is an example of trying to repair the past/correct mistakes their parents made and thus heal themselves. It is naive but also very selfish. Some, not all, also know they will receive government funding when they have a child but they lack foresight about the struggles they will face and the constant need for money when the child arrives. Also the constant loving care a child needs will constrict their mobility greatly, one needs to be stable on many fronts; emotionally, mentally, physically and financially to raise a healthy child. Please note, I am not suggesting a person in need not receive any government assistance, that would also be irresponsible. One should provide neccessities of life for ones child. I received government subsidized daycare and a monthly baby bonus for my 2 children for many years. It was extremely helpful.

In North America, a main issue is not the pregnancy but contraseptives. This will be discussed in detail in a future blog. However, in an equal money system, there will be a huge decline in the number of  unplanned , unwanted pregnancies. Subsequently, there will be a huge decline in teen poverty, domestic violence, suicide, mental illness. One of the reasons young women get pregnant is too leave their current dometic situation/family unit where they could have been emotionally, physically abused.  They do not have the financial means to live independantly so they see starting their own family as a way out, a fresh start. No blame here, just statements.  Largely I say this because in an equal money system the implications for a society are huge. Just to focus on pregnancy for now, from a starting point of financial stability, one can breath, let go of the constant energetic reacion of fear in the stuggle for survival, where’s my next meal, working for minmum wage and just making enough to provide food and roof over your/your families head.

As an aside, it is interesting , currently you see the middle class as slaves to the rich and the elite cannot afford a vacation, are losing their homes, cannot do anything but work, living pay cheque to pay cheque,which is not life but a form of robotic existance. I’m not even touching the subject of flat out poverty- the middle class=new widening lower class-are not being quiet and remaining good litttle robots in earth’s big factory for rich-they are getting pissed off–little too much greed there-ooops!  Memo to the rich: you made a boo boo, you should have thrown us some more bones so we would continue feeding off our addiction to consumerism, it keeps us busy so we don’t notice all the millions if not billions you are hoarding.

Anyway, I digress, in an equal money society women, young women will have a real alternative to dependancy on their parents/main caregivers/boyfriend/husband. This will reduce unwanted pregnancy in all woman of child bearing years. Equal Money will also reduce the number of abortions of all women. Let me walk through this:   If one has stable income the point of building a family unit for stability and survival will be eliminated. A woman will have a real ‘choice’ to decide how they want to express themselves and contribute to their world, no longer constricted by the social situation they were born into, geography, all the various opportunities for a decent future money buys. These opportunities include: education, transportation, adequate rest/sleep because one needs to work and look after children or go to school, less stress which can lead to physical and mental illness in the form of addiction, afford a break/vacation for rest and enjoyment so life is not just about ‘getting through it’.  If they are in a current relationship they do not have to remain, they will have the means=the money to leave a unsatisfactory situation and start new life in which they can afford to house, cloth, feed, educate their children without having to ‘bend over’ compromise/prostitute themselves.

Some memories of my childhood, specifically  in relation to  my father ‘picking on’, humiliating, his 4 children.  Lets heal this ! Of course this  includes my father, who I love.

I remember hiding in my room, listening at the door to my Dad yell at my brother, I believe my Dad was  drinking (most of these incidents occurred when he was intoxicated-not an excuse but important to note how alcohol can bring out the ‘evil’ side of a human being! Best to face this sober and get rid of these inner demons for good!). He often ‘helped ‘ my brother with his homework this way, yelling at him, putting him down, belittling him about being stupid and a failure if he didn’t ‘get it right’ and ‘get it right-right now’!  I felt terror, I felt my brothers pains, his shame and I internalized it, just as he did.

Another incident my Dad was picking on me when I was in grade nine, he generally left me alone when I was younger, had  3 others to attack and that’s why I hid and I hid well. So when my oldest brother and sister had left-escaped-he noticed me and I became a target. ‘She blackens her eyes so you don’t notice her big nose’ . Not a good thing to say to a 14 year old girl! I obsessed my looks more and more for years, I was convinced I was basically ugly unless I really ‘tried’=lot of make-up. So sad. “Don’t you know how to chop vegtables, didn’t your mother show you?” he’d yell in a harsh, accusatory voice and then no matter how you tried he would put down your efforts and make you feel completely stupid, a useless failure and I hated him for it …then the guilt, ‘oh god, I hate my father, I can’t hate him, it’s not allowed, he must be right, blah blah…’  Then his guilt/remorse would kick in and he’d be super nice for the next few days. There would be gifts of money, goodies, a little kind attention !  So there was a strange confusion/uncertainly within self and within the home. I would tell myself (unconsciously) “.. remember , you cannot trust his kindness because experience has shown you it does not last–when your guard is down – WHAM he gets you! Damn, I wasn’t going to put myself in that situation ie. be home at 4pm on a day he is home early  so be a possible target-ever again. I would blame myself , enough said, it is a horrible way to live for the perpetrator and the victim. It is dispicable to treat a child this way , he may as well have smashed in my face, at least the pain/abuse would have been visable. No excuses, no holding back, it just plain destroyed me. I didn’t have a chance.


thought: I’m ugly and stupid.

Self forgiveness: I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think, ‘I’m ugly and stupid’ . I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe the thought, ‘I am ugly and stupid’ and I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to have the thought, ‘I am ugly and stupid’ to exist within and as me.

Self forgiveness on connection to words: I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the words dad, father, alcohol, drunk, plain, incompetent, afternoon, boyfriend, vegtables, nose, make-up, chop, new and learn to the thought, ‘I am ugly and stupid.’

Self Corrective Statement: Whenever I go into an energetic reaction of self doubt and shame at the thought, ‘I am ugly and stupid’, I stop, I breath.  I no longer accept and allow myself to be directed by emotions of fear of failure and shame from the past.   Instead I remind myself I am in the process of birthing myself as life in the physical and it takes time so I remind myself to be patient and kind to myself. I realize my father was very ‘sorry’ as he got older and did the best he could at the time with me and all his children. I realize he would have ‘done things differently’ and taken back all the pain he caused to his children if he could. I bring myself back ‘here’ to the physical and out of my mind and get on with my day and the task at hand.


Thought: I hate my father but I have to keep silent and do as he says or I could be harmed.

Self forgiveness: I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think, ‘I hate my father but I have to keep silent and do as he says or I could be harmed.’

Self Forgiveness on Connection to Words: I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the words humiliate, fear, hate, shame, insignificant, small, jail, little, helpless, woman, girl, slave, hopeless, suppressed, bedroom, inferior, harmed, punish, punishment and weak to the thought, ‘I hate my father but I have to keep silent and do as he says or I could be harmed.’

Self Corrective Statement: Whenever I go into an energetic reaction of fear in relation to the thought, ‘I hate my father but I have to keep silent and do as he says or I could be harmed’ I stop, I breath. I no longer accept and allow myself to be silenced and  directed by and as this fear of loss of safety. I realize I am not this fear and that I am in fact safe ‘here’ in this moment and that this emotion exists only in my mind as memory of past experience.  Instead I bring myself out of my mind and back to the physical so as not to have the past, as suppression, as a starting point of this ‘here’ moment. I realize I am learning how to express myself in self honesty and self trust. I trust myself to continue with my day.


Thought: I have to keep men ‘happy’ or they will punish me with physical or mental abuse.

Self Forgiveness: I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think, ‘ I have to keep men ‘happy’ or they will punish me with physical or mental abuse.’

Self Forgiveness on Connection to Words: I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the words money, homeless, sex, slave, home, children, abandon, alone, helpless, shame, shut-up, stupid, careful, men, beauty, sexy, aging, ugly, prison, hopeless, quiet, fix, silent and mistake to the thought, ‘I have to keep men ‘happy’ or they will punish me with physical or mental abuse.’

Self Corrective Statement: Whenever I have the thought,  ‘I have to keep men ‘happy’ or they will punish me with physical or mental abuse’ and I go into an energetic reaction of fear of loss, of physical necessities and company, I stop, I breath. I realize I am responsible for my own security and ‘well being’. I realize I am in a process of changing and understand me and it will take time and remind myself to be patient. I no longer accept and allow myself to remain ‘victim’ of past thought patterns.   Instead I bring myself out of my ‘head’ the back to what is real, what is here in my physical reality no longer punish myself by repeating the pattern of helpless victim, creating a timeloop in which my now moment is a starting point of a past moment, thereby creating a future from the past. I trust myself remain ‘here’ with the breath and attend to the situation that is concerning me, in a practical way, that places responsibility for myself on myself and not blaming another.


Thought: I want to protect my brother but I can’t because I’m too weak, I lack power.

Self Forgiveness: I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think, ‘I want to protect my brother but I can’t because I’m too weak, I lack power.

Self Forgiveness on connection to words:  I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to connect the words afraid, helpless, hopeless, Dad, brother, rescue, hate, pain, mean, wrong, stupid, homework, learn, protect, hierarchy, rule, king, ruler, control, lack and power, to the thought,  ‘I want to protect my brother but I can’t because I’m too weak, I lack power.’

Self Corrective Statement:  Whenever I go into an energetic reaction of fear of loss of control, at the thought, ‘I want to protect my brother but I can’t because I’m too weak, I lack power’, I stop, I breath. I realize I have, in that moment, gone into my mind of past ‘experiences’ and I immediately bring myself back ‘here’ to this physical moment. I no longer accept and allow myself to be directed by this fear, as I now understand that this ‘power’ / ‘control’ I once perceived to be real, does not exist. I realize all that exist is me, as life as one and equal to all physicality in my world. Instead I remind myself true power is ‘know thyself’ but knowing is not enough, one must walk this knowing in each breath. So I trust myself and I continue with whatever needs to be done, to ensure my and the others safety and security.

Please investigate EqualMoney.Org and find out how you can effectively heal yourself and our planet.

Being pregnant is difficult in the best of circumstances.  I realize there are women who breeze through this experience but for most of us regular shmucks it’s a very trying time on many fronts. I recall with my second pregnancy, thinking I must have cancer (not to be insensitive to anyone who’s life has been affected by cancer) because within the first 2 or 3 weeks I was literally exhausted and felt very ill.  I did not consider I was pregnant at the time for several reasons. It hit me like a truck and I spent alot of time in bed. Now, at that time I lived in a lovely neighbourhood, owned a home and good vehicle and though my husband and I did not have alot extra, we had a wonderful life. I was a stay at home mom to my 2 year old daughter.

I live in Canada which provides an excellent health care system. I did not have to work, (although looking after a 2 year old is work) not outside the home anyway. I had all doctor appointments, exams paid for, all hospital fees were taken care of ; doctor, delivery room and staff, any drugs, emergency surgery (C-section with my first born) and 3 days in the hospital.  In Canada perscription drugs are not provided for free but I recall I did not take anything stronger than an asprin occasionally during pregnancy anyhow. Just a note, it was not through any great discipline on  my part, I did not drink at all and smoked very little because I felt  sooooo sick for the first 3 months with both my kids and then 4-9months I was used to this routine so it was easy to keep up.

Throughout both of my pregnancies, my second I used a midwife, (there was a fee but it was not much) anyone I saw, as a patient, treated me with the utmost respect, gave me their undivided attention, time, sincere concern, and advice. I never felt looked down upon or unimportant. Good thing too, it’s a very vulnerable position to be in, for anyone! It is also an emotional and frightening time for a woman, her body is changing rapidly and she has to be concerned about another life , in the immediate moment and for several years to come, yikes!  Yes, woman need much TLC during this time, I say this in all honestly and sincerity.

Well, I went through all of that for a reason, to give you a picture, in stark comparison, to the reality hundreds of thousands of pregnant women face each year.  I was aghast, sadly not surprised, to read about some of the horrors poor, pregnant women face in the  vast slums of Nairobi. When some of these women were asked about their major concerns, two things emerged.  One, the poor treatment they received from healthcare workers , due to the stigma of  ‘poor’ branded on these women and the harsh reality of the necessity to earn income outside of the home.

In an article taken from ‘The Standard’, a Nairobi online newpaper, written by Michael Oriedo,  March30,2011,   “The African Population and Health Research Centre (APHRC) study says poor women shun modern maternity and delivery services, not because they do not have money, but because they suffer poor treatment at the facilities .The study finds that some health providers are not charitable towards poor pregnant women, often abandoning them or ignoring them when they visit health center and hospitals.”   So these women often turn to local midwives who are affordable and give them the  time and respectful service they deserve -as a human being-and to the unborn human being she is carrying!  This is not to suggest the midwife is inferior to the traditional medical doctor/nurse in any way, but one should not have to go without necessary treatment and seek out an alternative, which could take weeks and have financial costs, when there are already, at a facility, capable practitioners in attendance.

It is no longer acceptable to me to not speak out, I do not condone this behaviour from other human beings any longer. These women are equal to the richest of pregnant women anywhere in this world and must be treated as such. They are indeed life as is the unborn child, as are you, as is the care provider who ignores the patient.  In a society of equal money this will not occur as each will be provided for from birth until death, all necessities will be met. There will be no charge for essential health care services. Each will be given the same amount of money to live on for some form of accountability and enough money  for essentials of life. You will not pay rent or a mortgage to a bank so some few families are incredibly rich, beyond imagination and get to have the earth as their playground while the vast, majority of humans suffer horribly with nothing and nothing to look forward to. I refuse to listen to the excuse, ‘well, that is their lot in life’, ‘God, has a plan’, ‘there is nothing I can do about  it’, “it’s up to my higher power, I’m not in control of that, they must have something to learn.’  What crap, shame on us.

if I was to take a can of spray paint and cover your house or car in graffiti would you have the right to stop me, maybe its just ‘gods will’ or your lot in life or a ‘higher plan’ well, you can fix it but each time you fix it , i did it again, would it make you angry? And that was just your property not your wife, mother, sister, child I was damaging. ‘That’s rediculous’, you may retort, no what is rediculous is to let a situation continue in which one pregnant woman is taken care of and another overlooked-simply becasue of the coin in her purse. Literally one baby is given human care/love and another human discarded, that is dispicable.

The second major problem, the pregnant women in the slums of Nairobi face, is the stark fact of needing to make money so their families don’t starve, let alone pay for other necessities of daily living…er I should say daily surviving.  The same article in The Standard, Michael Oriedo reports, “…Poverty forces pregnant women into doing heavy workloads, catering for the children they have already as well as  babies’ needs. Due to poverty, women work hard during pregnancy and the period surrounding it. They work in construction sites as head-carriers and loaders, stay out late selling their wares, or go from door to door looking for work,” 

Head carriers! That is heavy physical labour, I would have puked and fainted and I am completely serious. Now I would have also gotten up , like these women, and ‘soldiered on’ to feed my other children at home, pay rent and electricity etc. but it would be hell.I assume it is very hot in Nairobi so easy to become dehydrated. I wonder if these women get fair/compassionate breaks, water, nutrition, increased bathroom breaks on the job site, paid sick days or just sick days without threat of loosing their job, paid time off for doctors appointments? Perhaps some, I don’t know but I’m guessing no. Why? Am I jaded? Sure, I’ve felt like crap before and been treated like crap before and I don’t wish it on my fellow human sisters.Yes, I am jaded by the proven greed of the human race, the never ending race. Perhaps some employers do or/and some want to be helpful to these women but have their own troubles and family to pay for. I know I have been guilty of this , ‘I’ll be more ‘giving’ after I straighten out this debt I have.’ Slipping into justifying self interest, sadly, it’s the money system. We’re monkeys in a cage, all of humanity but the rich and the invisable elite. They have the freedom/movement that money provides, all the best services (health, fitness, travel, vacations, no stress from money worries).

 Now, I understand other places in the world have trials and tribulations for the pregnant woman, this is not a competition, I am simply looking at one situation in our world. We are not separate;, one world, your world , my world. Indeed, one baby, your baby, my baby. One problem for us all to address and, finally,  find a solution that is best for all.

These women have to work very hard to save enough money to make up for the time they will miss from work after the delivery and time they will spend at home. Many have no choice but to continue with the heavy workload immediately after birth. This often results in sapping the women’s energy and blood and leaves them fragile. Understandably, the women then are exposed to horrific outcomes: bleeding, anaemia, hypertension, malaria, placenta retention, premature labour, prolonged or obstructed labour and preeclampsia (convulsions).These problems often result in stillbirths, premature births, pregnancy loss, maternal mortality, morbidity, and deformity. 

One of the women interviewed, a 27-year-old mother, told of her experience of nearly dying five days after giving birth. She worked as a cleaner until a week before her delivery and resumed her job few days after giving birth. Sadly, on her first day at work after delivery, she suffered heavy bleeding. She had to start work immediately so her children wouldn’t starve. Although she knew she needed to stay home and rest she simply needed the money.It nearly cost her her life.

Please investigate a real alternative, that is best for all at http://www.EqualMoney.Org. Let us all stand together to create a better world, an equal world!  





Thought: It doesn’t matter if I write a book on self forgiveness or not, no one will read it.

Self sabotage: I have fallen on a point before I even stand, before I write one word , I have believed a thought in my mind-which has no reality unless it is given a reality by me acting on it!  And so I follow my ego, perhaps some doubt and guilt creep in, no matter, my mind has many justifications,  ‘Well, not many people would read it, not enough to make a difference’ ‘I really don’t know how to market a book on the internet anyway’ ‘i’ve never had any success selling stuff I’ve made’ ‘ what am I a sheep?  Following everything said at Desteni, it’s rediculous’.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself  to think, ‘It doesn’t matter if i write a book on self forgiveness or not, no one will read it.’I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe the thought, ‘It doesn’t matter if i write a book on self forgiveness or not, no one will read it.’ I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to have  the thought, ‘It doesn’t matter if i write a book on self forgiveness or not, no one will read it’ exist  within and as me as real.

Self Realizations: I realize I no longer accept and allow myself to project into the future/determine the ‘future’ from a starting point of a past memory. I realize ‘past’ experiences do not determine who and what I am in this here moment of breath. I realize I can learn how to set up a store online and market products. I realize it is a pointless waste of my time to participate in ‘worry’ about not selling something I don’t even have yet! Lol, how insane is that!  I realize a self forgiveness book is a productive use of my time as it helps me in my process ‘here’, it may help others or, if I don’t make it, through changes  that are occuring on earth, hopefully it/the book will remain to assist future generations. I realize Desteni has assisted and supported me in several ways and continues to do so , in my personal process of becoming self  as life (not self as ego) , explained my mind to me, provides  an invaluable community of  beings who have the same values as myself (never found that before in my life) and has provided me with a platform to express myself. We are one and equal, I can switch roles and play the shepard sometime.

Self corrective statement: Whenever I have the thought,  ‘It doesn’t matter if I write a book on self forgiveness or not, no one will read it’, I stop, I breath. I no longer accept and allow myself to be directed by excuses and  justification of the mind. I realize this  thought is of the mind  I bring myself back ‘here’ to the physical and remain here with the breath in each moment. I realize it is impossible to share the message -solution- of self forgiveness if everyone projected into the future and assumed no one will read a SF booklet, no one will if it is not written. I carry on with my day and begin writing.


The subject and actual  doing of the task of self forgiveness can seem overwhelming. One of the ways the ego uses self sabotage is to bring up self defeating thoughts  in your mind, ‘OMG, I’m a mess, a disaster, where do I start, I can’t possible cover everything, it’s impossible, too big for me’ and so one can feel exhausted and acutally fall on a point of self forgiveness before one even attempt to stand. The ego is a tricky, sly little devil, just writing those ‘excuses’ out I feel depleted, tierd. This is the ego’s way of using energy to drain you before you even begin! Good news, you don’t need/require energy, all you need is breath. Even better, you don’t need to hesitate with thoughts, so let’s  just breath and continue…er… begin.

I will take this exercise as a living example here and now: Sandy, write about self sabotage as how it relates to self forgiveness. Do this as a living document as what is best for all, to eleminate/kill the ego so we may all transend the ego and become Self As Life versus Self As Ego.

Thoughts: ‘Huh, me? Well the others can do it better, they’ve been members of Desteni for 2-3-4 years and I only just joined about 10 months ago. I’ll let them do it’ The sabotage: my ego is winning, speaking as thougths in my mind, loud and clear. My ego is giving me an ‘out’ by using the fear of ‘not being good enough’ /inferior/fear of failure- risk of rejection/losing the support of Desteni. Result: I, as one being of the whole, do not contribute what I have learned, my individual experience will be missing, as  part of the whole. I do not change but remain stuck in a timeloop, having to face this point  of being less than (in this case, less experienced) as an excuse to not participate fully in/as a solution for the world’s current condition but remain part of the problem.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself  to think I have less to offer in a Book on Self Forgiveness than others at Desteni because I have less experience.  Note: I always forgive: the thought, believing the thought and  having the thought exist within/as me as real so…  I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to believe the thought that I have less to offer in a Book on Self Forgiveness than others at Desteni because I have less experience. And, I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to have the thought’ I have less to offer in a Book on Self Forgiveness than others at Desteni because I have less experience’ to exist within and as me as real.